A Place to Lay My Heart
”.. because while you can take off in an instant, going back [home] takes a long time.”
Gifts on Valentine’s Day
Reading this article called “When Love Outgrows Gifts on Valentine’s Day” was sobering. Reminded me that love is not found in materialism. It’s a simple message that I forget easily, especially since I’m still unemployed and there are shoes I want to buy. No joke.
The article also talked about “gifts of the psychological and intangible sort.” It gave an example about “granting implicit permission for a spouse to pursue a passion that is somewhat pricey.” I didn’t think about having to ask permission for starting a hobby if I ever had a spouse. But this article got me thinking how to truly honor the other in a relationship. I already know it’s not about me, but if I’m faced with a decision about sacrificing my job so my future spouse can pursue his dream in another location, it really makes me think. Love can kind of suck, especially when it’s sacrificial.
I think in the long run, love can be worth it. But the focus can’t be how the other person can satisfy my needs. People weren’t created purely to meet their spouses’ needs; I need to remember only Christ can satisfy completely and if anything, the spouse provides glimpses of Christ’s love.
My favorite quote from the mentioned article is from Mae Mosher, a 92 year old woman who has been married for 70 years. She comments on the gift-giving tradition in relationships: “It is very sweet and nice when you are 20 or 25, but we are so safe and secure in our love for each other, there is no need for that kind of thing.”
One more thing: “Ike and Mae Mosher, who have been married for 70 years, never established much of a traditional gift-giving ritual between them because they stretched their finances early on in their relationship to support his mother and sister when his father died. Ms. Mosher’s sacrifices early on were her own gift to Mr. Mosher and his family.”
It inspires me that they used their money for something much more meaningful than on themselves. How purposeful and selfless. I want my marriage to reflect that too.
